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rich parent, poor parent

david brooks writes today that there are large class differences in parenting styles. these different parent styles may explain the continued success of the upper class. hey, this fits in very well into the parenting theme week at 11d. thanks, davey. (and thanks, jeremy, for the early morning e-mail.)

david picks up on the work of annette lareau who finds that although working class children are more innocent and enjoy more freedom, they haven't been prepared for economic success as well as upper class kids. (i have copied the whole article below the flap. take that, times select)

the funny thing about academics is that although they are highly educated, they are poorly paid. they are socio-economic anomalies. they either reside as the poor shlubs in wealthy neighborhoods or as the weirdoes in working class towns. we’ve been the class outsiders for my whole life, and i’ve had the chance to observe both life styles closely.

there are huge differences between the parenting styles between the upper and working class families. poor families respond less quickly to learning problems and are less aggressive with the school bureaucracy. they are less likely to verbally interact with their kids. they are less involved in homework activities. middle and upper class parents are more likely to reward independent thinking. all those factors will definitely impact on their kids’ futures.大学毕业英文演讲稿

but i hope that brooks and his pet academic aren’t insinuating that parenting styles alone impact on a child’s economic success. way too many other factors there. poor families are also likely to live in towns with poorer schools. peers will be more troubled. the poor families will be coping with a variety of problems that make it hard to be good parents – financial stress, drug and alcohol problems, lack of health care, depression. and really smart kids can in many instances over come all that and succeed, though even the smart ones still face obstacles. i would love to know if the researchers controlled for all that.

these parenting differences also don’t negate our obligation to helping these groups reach their potential.

that said, i’m sure that parenting styles are one factor among many that determine a child’s socio-economic future. my kid is already on such a different path from some of his buddies from school. at six years old, their futures are already written on their faces.

what i would like to do is to take the best parts of both parenting practices. somehow combine the respect for adults, the freedom, and the innocence of working class homes with the value for education, the aggressive independence, and confidence of the upper class. it’s a tricky line to navigate, but that’s what i’m going for.


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